life coach rona 16 04 17 ballons


Yesterday we were in the city and decided to have lunch as a family. My daughter was in a mood (as teenage girls sometimes are ). Her mood escalated when a menu item wasn’t available. This caused tension at the table. My husband and I glanced at each other with a knowing look. We had a choice: attach or detach.

We could attach. We could let our own emotions escalate. We could get into her box and tell her she is acting childish, that her behavior is selfish, that she is ruining our lunch.

We chose to detach. We accepted her mood by ignoring it. Not ignoring her but the mood. And something magical happened–the energy of the tension among us dissipated. By the time appetizers came, we were engaged in a conversation that was pleasant and interesting.

When fear, tension, anger, and frustration arise we tend to cling to those feelings and add to their intensity through our thoughts and the meaning we assign to those feelings. But there is another way: We can choose to allow the feelings to pass through us. Letting go or detaching offers a feeling of peace and freedom through a disciplined mind. From this place, we are better able to deal with our issues.

The next time you notice unpleasant feelings arise, try to remember in that moment you have a choice to attach to or detach from the negativity. Choose peace.


life coach rona 16 04 10 path


I have a sugar addiction. My way of managing my addiction is to try to avoid sugar in the form of cakes, cookies, candy, and ice cream.

Friday afternoon I was overwhelmed, unmotivated, and craving something sweet. So I headed for a baggie of leftover Easter candy. As I was eating a mini Reese’s a question came to mind: Do I want to experience pleasure or happiness?

I was able to put the baggie down (that time ). That simple question clarified and reminded me of what I value most–happiness.

When you find yourself doing things that bring you pleasure at the expense of your happiness, rather than deny yourself the pleasure, why not choose happiness instead? This shifts our attitude from feeling as though we are giving up something to one of moving toward something of greater value.

What activities are you engaging in that bring you pleasure at the expense of your happiness?