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Created: 24 April 2016

Several years ago my husband was diagnosed with cancer. The initial prognosis was not a good one. I remember picking up my daughter at elementary school during that time–sunny days, children’s laughter, moms talking intently among themselves, my daughter excitedly running toward me. I greeted moms and teachers with smiles and polite small talk. All the while...I was falling to pieces inside.

Today, my husband’s prognosis is great. But the poignant memory of the contrast between my inner and outer world stayed with me as this was imprinted on my soul: “You never know who among us is falling to pieces.”

Carrying this thought makes it is easy and desirable to positively touch every person I encounter. It’s simple: eye contact and a smile, holding the door, small talk, a compliment, an understanding glance at the mom whose child is acting up, buying a coffee for the person ahead of you at Starbucks.

You’ll find that the more you do this the more you will want to do it. It creates of virtuous cycle that promotes lasting happiness–not to mention the positive energy that reverberates throughout our planet as a result of your actions. ????

So go out there and get your kindness on!

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Created: 17 April 2016

Yesterday we were in the city and decided to have lunch as a family. My daughter was in a mood (as teenage girls sometimes are ). Her mood escalated when a menu item wasn’t available. This caused tension at the table. My husband and I glanced at each other with a knowing look. We had a choice: attach or detach.

We could attach. We could let our own emotions escalate. We could get into her box and tell her she is acting childish, that her behavior is selfish, that she is ruining our lunch.

We chose to detach. We accepted her mood by ignoring it. Not ignoring her but the mood. And something magical happened–the energy of the tension among us dissipated. By the time appetizers came, we were engaged in a conversation that was pleasant and interesting.

When fear, tension, anger, and frustration arise we tend to cling to those feelings and add to their intensity through our thoughts and the meaning we assign to those feelings. But there is another way: We can choose to allow the feelings to pass through us. Letting go or detaching offers a feeling of peace and freedom through a disciplined mind. From this place, we are better able to deal with our issues.

The next time you notice unpleasant feelings arise, try to remember in that moment you have a choice to attach to or detach from the negativity. Choose peace.

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Created: 10 April 2016

I have a sugar addiction. My way of managing my addiction is to try to avoid sugar in the form of cakes, cookies, candy, and ice cream.

Friday afternoon I was overwhelmed, unmotivated, and craving something sweet. So I headed for a baggie of leftover Easter candy. As I was eating a mini Reese’s a question came to mind: Do I want to experience pleasure or happiness?

I was able to put the baggie down (that time ). That simple question clarified and reminded me of what I value most–happiness.

When you find yourself doing things that bring you pleasure at the expense of your happiness, rather than deny yourself the pleasure, why not choose happiness instead? This shifts our attitude from feeling as though we are giving up something to one of moving toward something of greater value.

What activities are you engaging in that bring you pleasure at the expense of your happiness?